In these turbulent times I’ve been able to talk (virtually) with a lot of people who are taking the opportunity to reflect, read books, and rethink their lives — at least in some aspect. Time seems to go more slowly during these weeks of lockdown, and that makes us rethink our lives and goals.
I turned 45 a couple of weeks ago, and I’m no exception when it comes to rethinking my life — I think I’ve never read so many books on personal growth and philosophy, among other topics. I don’t know if the famous midlife crisis is also hitting me, but I’ve been searching for meaning in my life, and this has made me think about my values — which is what I wanted to talk to you about today.
There are values that have accompanied me for many years on a professional level, I’ll admit. On a personal level, I’ve always thought I needed to be consistent with the values I defined for my companies, but I never actually stopped to define them. I don’t think I’m being fake, but on a personal level there are also different kinds of values.
Let’s first look at values on a professional level
When I sold my agency in Brussels, a few months later we did a kick-off with the agency that bought us, and one of the exercises was defining values. Before starting, everyone had to explain their expectations. Mine was clear: we had to find values that defined our “soul.” Unfortunately, at the end of the session I wasn’t satisfied — the consensus values had no soul, they were materialistic…
When years later I launched the Mind Your Group (MYG) project, I personally took charge of defining the values — it was the project’s DNA and I took it very seriously. In the end I settled on 7 values:
No Egos: The key to having a cohesive team and a scalable business model is that everyone in the company accepts constructive criticism and is aware that we can’t know everything or always be right. This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have self-respect.
Honesty and Transparency: To fully trust each other and build trust in client relationships, we must know how to acknowledge our mistakes, not hide information, and avoid all kinds of “politicking.” In our company, doing something because it looks good “politically” is forbidden — no non-constructive emails to deflect responsibility, etc.
Accountability: At Mind Your Group we ask everyone on our team to act responsibly. To take ownership of their tasks since we’re all in the same boat. If a problem arises, any team member will take charge of it as soon as they detect it and until someone else eventually takes over.
Customer-Centered: Our business is helping our clients, and they’re at the center of our concerns. Before doing something, ask yourself “Does this add value for our client(s)?” If not, advise the client against it even if that impacts our billing. And very importantly — exceed expectations: Under promise & over deliver!
Resilience: The field we work in and the current situation/revolution mean nothing is fixed — everything can change overnight. Facing this reality, everyone in the company must have the capacity to confront changes and grow in the face of adversity. For department leaders in the group, being able to pivot when necessary to adapt to new realities is essential.
Excellence: 100% perfection doesn’t exist — it’s a pipe dream, we’re human. Nevertheless, we must all strive to execute what we do excellently at all levels, not just when someone is watching ;-)
Passion: At Mind Your Group we love what we do and how we do it. We don’t like gray professionals, and we face challenges with optimism and energy.
I believe these values will accompany me in my future ventures, since today, 8 years later, I still agree with them. However, on a personal level I’m missing values, as I mentioned, or they should be different.
Let’s move on to personal values
Freedom: At my age, after having gone through the experience of working for someone else (a few years, I’ll admit), I’ve realized that something I value greatly is freedom. Freedom is, for example, being able to choose your projects, your schedule, or having the freedom to spend time with my kids. I’ve realized I perform more and better when I feel free. I can get up on a Sunday at 6 am (this very morning I’m writing this at 6 am) and work for a few hours before my little monsters wake up. The bow tie model came to me one weekend in my garden…
Purpose: I need to feel useful, fulfilled in what I do. During my experience at a large company, there were many things I did that from my perspective had no meaning or value, which undermined me emotionally. For me, it’s therefore important that what I do makes sense so I can feel more fulfilled. If I had to summarize my purpose in one sentence: “Live a life with moments of happiness, working on something I’m passionate about that allows me to have the means to guarantee my children’s education, my quality of life, without forgetting to have the time to enjoy good moments with my loved ones.”
Love, Affection, and Sharing with Your People: It’s important to feel emotions in your life. Currently, after my divorce, I’ve focused a lot on my kids and our relationship has grown much closer. I feel great spending time with them, hugging them, watching a movie with popcorn, or listening to them tell me stories and adventures. Giving love and affection is essential in life, and you’ll feel good just by giving them.
A Stress-Free Life: I remember a coworker who said I looked like a headless chicken — stress has accompanied me through almost my entire professional life, and even though it seems like you perform better, that’s rarely the case. I’ve discovered the importance of centering myself. Now I practice Mindfulness or sit on a park bench reading for an hour under the sun watching kids play and old folks strolling or playing pétanque. This new tranquility in my life brings me peace and happiness, and best of all, it’s free.
Focus on Your Goals: We only have one life and it’s important to focus. There are always shinier, newer, more attractive things — the neighbor’s grass is always greener. It’s important to define what you want in life and then focus on it to avoid getting too scattered. For this I’ve started using a Bullet Journal which helps me not lose my direction and goals. Another key here is to clearly distinguish between what’s important and what’s urgent.
Out with Toxic People and Situations: There are toxic people in our surroundings who either fill our heads with negative ideas or drain us of energy. We need to distance ourselves from them. Just as there are toxic people, there are also toxic situations that don’t contribute anything — quite the opposite. They might seem to bring us pleasure, but often that pleasure is short-term and then we pay the consequences. One word: out!
I’m sure more will come to me over time — in any case I’m one short of the magic number 7, and I hope to feel better about myself and happier every day ;-)
And you? What are your values? Don’t hesitate to share them and help me find number 7 ;-)
P.S. By the way, today is my son Luca’s birthday — he’s turning 12, and I’ve prepared the homemade bolognese sauce he asked for and Belgian chocolate mousse ;-)
Original Comments
No comments on this post.
Before commenting, prove you're human: